Thursday, July 2, 2009

Anak jaman sekarang bikin heran


Minggu lalu baru ada sodara-sodara saya yang dateng dari jakarta, yang dateng itu bu'de saya beserta anaknya dan cucu-cucunya which is berarti keponakan-keponakan saya. Keponakan-keponakan itu sebenernya keponakan jauh, jadi bukan keponakan langsung dari keluarga inti saya (ribet jelasinnya), pokoknya saya belum pernah ketemu sama mereka-mereka ini sebelumnya. Klo bu'de saya dan anaknya sih biasa-biasa aja, nothing awkward, tp yang menarik adalah keponakan-keponakan saya ini.. Ada 3 keponakan saya yang kemarin dateng, yang paling kecil laki-laki umur 3 tahun, lalu ada dua cewe umur 6 dan 7 tahun. Yang bikin saya heran adalah si anak cewe-cewe ini..padahal kan mereka masih kecil bgt ya, yang satu aja baru mau masuk sd, tp mereka itu udah ngerti pacar-pacaran. Waktu baru dateng aja di mobil ngomongnya gini:

cewe1: "dia kan pacar kamu"

cewe2: "bukan pacar aku bukan yang dia, tp yang itu, gantengan yang itu, klo yang dia bandel"

cewe1: "ciee..klo aku pacarnya si anu"
cewe2: "iya nih kangen ga ketemu sama si itu" terus si cewe1 ini ngambil hapenya pembantunya dan ngasih liat foto si "pacar" sambil bilang "ini pacar aku, ganteng kan?" terus tindakan berikutnya ini yang bikin saya kaget, si cewe1 nyium fotonya si "pacar"!!

Jujur saya agak shock dengan pembicaraan mereka, apa karena saya yang norak ga tau perkembangan anak-anak jaman sekarang atau emang keponakan-keponakan saya aja yang kecentilan?? Emang sih kedua keponakan saya ini agak sedikit hmm apa ya..bisa dibilang elit kali ya, mereka sekolah di sekolah international yang katanya uang per bulannya aja ngalahin uang satu semester saya kuliah, terus jalan-jalannya sering ke mall, bahkan salah satu dari mereka aja sekolahnya di dalem mall (can u imagine that?!). Kalau dilihat ada sisi positifnya juga sih dari ke "modern"an mereka ini, mereka bahasa inggrisnya udah fasih dari segi pengucapan dan terbiasa menggunakan bahasa inggris sehari-hari, terus mereka uptodate dengan lagu-lagu dan film-film (sayangnya lagu-lagunya lagu orang dewasa macamnya lagunya wali cari jodoh gtu, ckckck). Tp saya agak risih juga sih kadang-kadang dengan kelakuan dan bicara mereka kalau udah menyangkut masalah pacar-pacaran ini, kalau menurut saya belum pantas aja gtu..masa kalau saya dan pacar saya lagi duduk berdua(kebetulan emang kemarin ke jogja saya ngajak pacar saya), si nona-nona mini itu terus bisik-bisik, tp tetep kedengeran dikit dan sepenangkap saya mereka ngomongin saya ntar kissing-kissing sama pacar saya.. hellooooo omongan kaya gitu kayanya ga pantes bgt deh diomongin sama anak segitu.

Saya jadi was-was gimana generasi anak saya nanti?? harus agak extra hati-hati nih nantinya memantau pergaulan anak dari mulai masih kecil banget. jangan-jangan sex education harus dimulai sejak dini, mungkin bisa aja sejak TK udah dikasih sex education, habisnya dari yang saya liat dari keponakan-keponakan saya itu mereka sudah ada keingintahuan kearah-arah situ.. PR nih buat kita-kita para calon psikolog nantinya..

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

How to Love


Love is a strange thing. It can be the most amazing feeling in the world, or it can really hurt, but in the end love is something most, if not all of us, will face. While there are many different ways to define love and there are many different ways to love someone (even yourself), here is a general guide to loving..


1. Say it. When you say the words "I Love You", they should carry with them the desire to show someone that you love them, not what you simply want to feel. When you say it make sure you really mean it and are willing to do anything for that special person.

2. Empathize. Put yourself in someone else's shoes. Rather than impose your own expectations or attempt to control them, try to understand how they feel, where they come from, and who they are. Realize how they could also love you back just as well.

3. Love unconditionally. If you cannot love another person without attaching stipulations, then it is not love at all, but deep-seated opportunism (one who makes the most of an advantage, often unmindful of others). If your interest is not in the other person as such, but rather in how that person can enhance your experience of life, then it is not unconditional. If you have no intention of improving that person’s life, or allowing that person to be themselves and accepting them as they are, and not who you want them to be, then you are not striving to love them unconditionally.

4. Expect nothing in return. That doesn't mean you should allow someone to mistreat or undervalue you. It means that giving love does not guarantee receiving love. Try loving just for the sake of love. Realize that someone may have a different way of showing his or her love for you, do not expect to be loved back in exactly the same way. Realize it can be lost. If you realize that you can lose the one you love, then you have a greater appreciation of what you have. Think how lucky you are to have someone to love. Don't make an idol of the person you love. This will place them under undue pressure and will likely result in you losing them.


Here is some warnings on love (yeah love can be dangerous guys!!)



  • You must love yourself before you can love another.

  • There is always the risk of getting hurt, but that's part of letting yourself fully love and trust some one. Being hurt could be long-lasting and could hurt more than anything in the world.

  • Realize what you have while you have it, and care for the person you trust.

  • If something comes to an end, try to let go rather than holding on; it's for the best.

  • The idea of love is fueled by childhood fantasies. The love shown in movies, as obtainable as it may be, is rare to say the least.

  • You just may find your soul-mate sooner than you want to.

  • If you feel any doubt of love your partner has for you, make sure that your suspicions are grounded in reality. If you hurt your partner as a result of undeserved mistrust, he/she may end up doubting both your love for them and theirs for you.

  • Don't ask for love - you should receive love because your partner wants to give you love, not because you want it from your partner.

  • Do not force love - it will come in good time, it will come!