Wednesday, July 1, 2009

How to Love


Love is a strange thing. It can be the most amazing feeling in the world, or it can really hurt, but in the end love is something most, if not all of us, will face. While there are many different ways to define love and there are many different ways to love someone (even yourself), here is a general guide to loving..


1. Say it. When you say the words "I Love You", they should carry with them the desire to show someone that you love them, not what you simply want to feel. When you say it make sure you really mean it and are willing to do anything for that special person.

2. Empathize. Put yourself in someone else's shoes. Rather than impose your own expectations or attempt to control them, try to understand how they feel, where they come from, and who they are. Realize how they could also love you back just as well.

3. Love unconditionally. If you cannot love another person without attaching stipulations, then it is not love at all, but deep-seated opportunism (one who makes the most of an advantage, often unmindful of others). If your interest is not in the other person as such, but rather in how that person can enhance your experience of life, then it is not unconditional. If you have no intention of improving that person’s life, or allowing that person to be themselves and accepting them as they are, and not who you want them to be, then you are not striving to love them unconditionally.

4. Expect nothing in return. That doesn't mean you should allow someone to mistreat or undervalue you. It means that giving love does not guarantee receiving love. Try loving just for the sake of love. Realize that someone may have a different way of showing his or her love for you, do not expect to be loved back in exactly the same way. Realize it can be lost. If you realize that you can lose the one you love, then you have a greater appreciation of what you have. Think how lucky you are to have someone to love. Don't make an idol of the person you love. This will place them under undue pressure and will likely result in you losing them.


Here is some warnings on love (yeah love can be dangerous guys!!)



  • You must love yourself before you can love another.

  • There is always the risk of getting hurt, but that's part of letting yourself fully love and trust some one. Being hurt could be long-lasting and could hurt more than anything in the world.

  • Realize what you have while you have it, and care for the person you trust.

  • If something comes to an end, try to let go rather than holding on; it's for the best.

  • The idea of love is fueled by childhood fantasies. The love shown in movies, as obtainable as it may be, is rare to say the least.

  • You just may find your soul-mate sooner than you want to.

  • If you feel any doubt of love your partner has for you, make sure that your suspicions are grounded in reality. If you hurt your partner as a result of undeserved mistrust, he/she may end up doubting both your love for them and theirs for you.

  • Don't ask for love - you should receive love because your partner wants to give you love, not because you want it from your partner.

  • Do not force love - it will come in good time, it will come!



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